Judge asks the defendant, “Why did you steal that car, Mr. Jones?” Mr. Jones looks down, “I just had to get to work for an important meeting.” The judge keeps asking, “Well why…

“Your boyfriend, then?” he continues. “No, not at all,” she says, nibbling away at his ear. “Is it your dad or your brother?” he inquires, hoping to be reassured. “No, no, no! You…