Jokes

A police detective was at the house of a woman whose past three husbands had suspiciously died. "I heard your first two husbands died of food…

Three scruffy-looking bikers entered the truck stop where an elderly man was dining. The first biker chuckled and sat down at the counter as they passed the…

Mom: Time to wake up and go to school! Son: No, I don’t wanna go to school today! Mom: But you have to go to school. Son: But, I don’t wanna go to school. Mom:…

  A man walks into an antique store and starts looking around. Suddenly, he gazes upon the most stunning bronze statue of a Siamese cat. He asks the store owner…

A newly ordained priest, fresh out of seminary, is a little nervous about his first day in the confessional. He asks the senior priest to sit in on his…

A young bloke with his pants hanging half off his arse, two gold front teeth, and a half inch thick gold chain around his neck; walked into the Centrelink to…

Jane Benson returned home from college one day to see her family. While chatting together at dinner, her five year old brother Joey overheard Jane speaking…

A man returns home early from work one afternoon to find his wife spread out on the bed, puffing and panting.“What are you doing?” the man inquires. “Err,” she…

A wife was a little guilty that her husband wasn’t very happy because she didn’t like to do anything and didn’t want to ever leave the house. With this in mind,…

After giving up three runs in the top of the first, the manager runs out of the dugout to have a word with his rookie pitcher. The manager says, “Son, I think…

Little Johnny had left the house to meet his friends without asking his mother. Once he came home, his mother was not pleased. "Johnny," she said,…

An old man went to the college that he went to when he was a youth. He knocked on room number 3 of the hostel and said: “May I come in. I lived in this very…

The arithmetic teacher had written 10.9 on the blackboard and had then rubbed out the decimal point to show the effect of multiplying this number by ten.…

A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, “Hey lady, you are really ugly.”…

A young woman, (a new teacher) was giving an assignment to her Grade 6 class one day. It was a large assignment so she started writing high up on the…

  The CIA is interviewing three potential agents — two men and a woman. For the final test, they bring one of the male candidates to a…   He watched as his…

After our brand-new washing machine broke down, my in-laws, my husband, and I were discussing how today’s appliances can’t compete with the quality of those…

  The CIA is interviewing three potential agents — two men and a woman. For the final test, they bring one of the male candidates to a…   He watched as his…

A little boy went to the store with his grandmother and on the way home, he was looking at the things she had purchased. He found a package of panty hose and…

Everybody is entitled to their own opinion but that doesn’t mean that they have to force that opinion on others. Sometimes, however, there are people who want…