Jokes

At 3:00 in the morning, Laura woke up and gently tapped her husband on the shoulder. "Hector, wake up, wake up!" "Huhh?" Hector replied…

After receiving a beautiful haircut, a doctor asks the barber, “How much do I owe you?” “Oh, I never charge a doctor,” the barber replies. “You all do such…

A married man was visiting his “girlfriend”,  When she requested that he shave his beard.  “Oh James, I like your beard, but I would really love to see your…

During dinner, Little Johnny's mother catches him feeding the dog under the table. "Johnny," she says sternly. "You know very well that…

An older, white-haired man walked into a jewellery store one Friday evening with a beautiful young girl at his side. He told the jeweller he wanted a special…

Teacher: "Now Johnny, can you tell me some of your favorite numbers?" Little Johnny: "541, 29, 623, 188, 769 and 40." Teacher: "Very…

A husband shared his turmoil on Reddit after demanding a paternity test, suspecting he wasn’t the father of his wife’s child, which strained their 10-year…

A police detective was at the house of a woman whose past three husbands had suspiciously died. "I heard your first two husbands died of food…

A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says, “I’m on this cruise to…

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car.Both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along they came to an intersection.The…

Two buddies are fishing, but they haven’t caught anything all day.Then, another fisherman walks by with a huge load of fish. They ask him “excuse me, but where…

A man traveling by train asks the ticket collector what time the train stops at Victoria. “Sir, we don’t stop at Victoria.”“But I have to get off there!” “Well,…

A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning, the wife undoubtedly blonde, picked up the phone, listened a moment and said, “How should…

Jane Benson returned home from college one day to see her family. While chatting together at dinner, her five year old brother Joey overheard Jane speaking…

Three Blonds are walking down the street when they see some tracks. The first one said “I think they are dog tracks.” The second one said “I think they are cow…

A blonde car gets a flat tire on the Interstate one day So she eases it over onto the shoulder of the road. She carefully steps out of the car and opens the…

A wife was a little guilty that her husband wasn’t very happy because she didn’t like to do anything and didn’t want to ever leave the house. With this in mind,…

A man and his wife were sitting in the living room discussing a “Living Will” “Just so you know. I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some…

Little Johnny had left the house to meet his friends without asking his mother. Once he came home, his mother was not pleased. "Johnny," she said,…

A blonde gets on an airplane and sits down in the first class section. The stewardess tells her she must move to coach because she doesn’t have a first class…