Tag: Jokes

Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm. A couple…

A man is walking home late at night when he sees a woman in the shadows. “Twenty bucks,” she says. he’d never been with a call girl before. But he decides what the hell it’s only…

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. After having the beer, he asks the bartender for the bill. “$3”, says the bartender.The man just for fun goes on and places $1 coin on the…

When the graveside service for his wife had just finished, there was a tremendous burst of thunder accompanied by a distant lightning bolt and more rumbling thunder. The husband, a…

The nurse asked the patient to remove his clothing and put on a gown, to be checked by a doctor. “In front of you”?”, he asks, shyly. The nurse says, “Well no, but I’ve seen the…

An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world.So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando , thinking that he would start by working his way…

A girlfriend and boyfriend walked into the girlfriend’s house and the girlfriend said to her mom, “Mom, me and my boyfriend are going up to my room”… It was three o’clock in the…

A blind man walks into a bar, orders a drink and says,“Hey! Does anyone want to hear a blonde joke?” Then the woman next to him taps his shoulder and says,“Listen mister, I’m a…

A preacher was known for long and boring sermons. He preached for about one hour when he stopped to scold the congregation. He said, "I know you think my sermons are long, but…

They go on their honeymoon to beautiful, picturesque Venice, Italy. After a day of sightseeing, they return to their hotel. He turns to his young bride and says “Honey, I’m tired…

As he finished his sentence, he turned around to find that the man had followed and was standing right behind him, so the boy quickly added, “and this gentleman kindly offered to…

I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.  I took out my wallet,…

1. “If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up” said the sarcastic teacher. After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet. “Now then mister, why do you…

An Aussie truckie walks into an outback cafe with a full-grown emu behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders.The truckie says, ‘A hamburger, chips and a coke,’ and turns…

Two hikers are walking up a mountain trail when a huge grizzly bear leaps out in front of them and roars. The first hiker gulps and sweats, frozen in fear; the other keeps his…

Late one evening a Marine pulled into a little town, only to find that every hotel room was taken. When he finally got to the last hotel, he pleaded to the manager, “You’ve got to…

The preacher, in his Sunday sermon, used “Forgive Your Enemies” as his subject.After a long sermon, he asked how many were willing to forgive their enemies.About half held up their…

A husband had just finished reading a new book entitled, “You Can Be The Man Of Your House.” He stormed to his wife in the kitchen and announced, “From now on, you need to know…

One day a beggar knocked at the door of a house, and when a woman opened the door, asked her for alms.“I’ve nothing to give you,” said the woman. “Please go!”The woman, who was…

A tourist was driving down a deserted road when he came to a sign reading, "ROAD CLOSED. DO NOT ENTER." Looking at the road ahead, he thought it looked passable; assuming…